Going to try to keep an accurate count of days locked up.

I have a couple of timers set up on my tablet that I use to keep track of how long I am locked up, but I reset the timer after certain events (sex or masturbation), failing to record the duration. My plan is to log the duration from now on. Currently, I am only monitoring days, weeks and months. Days turn into a week rather quickly. Weeks however, they don't go by as fast... Yet...

My curiosity wonders how long I can go.

One thing that came to mind a couple of days ago: since I have shown no real signs of distress (sores or raw skin) with this device, how long is she going to make me go now? In fact, I had a little sore from the 3000 when I got this one. It bothered me for a few days, and eventually healed up. Haven't had an issue for the last three or four days. I guess that will all play into my overall duration. We'll see.

At this time, I am at 5 days with the only time out is my weekly "housekeeping" (shave, inspect and cleaning).

Something I just realized that I have found interesting.

Alright, it has been a week since I last masturbated, and two since we last had sex. I have remained locked up since I jerked off a week ago. Not entirely strange except what seems to happen mentally from day to day.

Day one seems to be that transitional period where you have become accustomed to having access to your dick, and suddenly you don't anymore. There is a period where you tend to tug at it and pull at it. Seems like every move you make gets hung up on clothing, or you find yourself banging it into everything.

Day two is a little less of day one, and day three is even less.

Day four seems to be about the time that it is starting to sink in that your access to your own body is limited. This is primarily true in the evenings and at night when things are settled down. This is when I begin to notice the weight and the gentle pull. This is when I find my hands unconsciously reaching to that area. Of course, the extra attention causes a little arousal which in turn causes pressure within the cage as the penis attempts to get hard. It's that bit that I like the most. The inability to get erect despite any outside stimulus. 

Heading into the following days, the above plays out over and over, again and again. Each time being just a little more pleasantly frustrating. After a while, that too will become common place and eventually come to an end.

Part of the reason for this play coming to an end is, I am the only one showing any interest.

Post initial comments about the new cage.

I have been wearing the unit almost non-stop since Friday evening. I have only taken it off a couple of times to adjust or address an ingrown hair. I did experience a little discomfort on Saturday while running some errands, but I attribute that to acclimation since this one sits differently from the CB series.

I have been doing some research online comparing similar units, and have come to the conclusion that this is the same unit sold by several online and adult stores for five or six times the cost. It is usually called the birdcage chastity. Thus far, I am happy with the purchase, and think that within a few days, I should be turning the keys over to my Queen permanently.

I have also been toying with locks. The one that is supplied with the unit seems rather flimsy, but sits better on the unit. The Master lock that came with the CB is definitely a more solid lock (considering that it is little more than a luggage lock), but rests sideways on the chastity, and tends to snag on clothing.

----

Last night, I decided to commit to this device full time. I had originally planned to do daily spot checks on myself and the cage, but at the rate that I have been getting used to it, I figured turning over the keys was just the best ideal. She now holds the keys once again. I can only hope that she decides to take interest in it this time. She did allow me to masturbate before my full commitment.

Now, the appropriate timers have been reset.

New cage is here.

Alright, so my last post was regarding what was hopefully to be an upgrade to the CB series cages that I have been wearing. Well, it finally arrived (much earlier than projected).

Initial impressions:

Packaging was simple but effective. Just a plastic mailing envelope with an address label. The address label wasn't terribly impressive. Yes, it got to me, but the return address didn't disguise the general contents. Personally, I am not concerned about it, but I can imagine how some might be a little more than embarrassed.

The contents were well wrapped and protected. The cage, ring and lock were wrapped in tissue paper. That was placed in a black, drawstring bag. All of that was in a plastic bag, then wrapped with plastic padding, and finally shoved into the plastic envelope with shipping label.

The ring portion that I chose is nearly identical in internal diameter as the CB series ring #2. That is what I have been wearing for the most part since we started this several months ago. It has a single post welded to it with a hole for the lock to pass through, and two smaller holes to accept two smaller posts on the cage.

The cage part is slightly longer than the Curve. The only downside to this is the same as it has always been.... I am not exactly endowed enough to warrant a cage this long. However, it seems that unless you are custom ordering, there is a bit of a "one size fits all" mentality.

Construction seems solid, although some of the welds appear marginal, there are no sharp edges or jagged points. Nothing apparent that suggests that it might cut, poke, stab, slice, or otherwise make me bleed.

This finish appears to be uniform.

So far, for thirty five bucks, I'm rather impressed.

Now, to try it on... I took off the Curve (I have been wearing that in order to get used to dealing with the longer cage for about a week or so) and took a shower. Beforehand, I soaked the new unit in alcohol to ensure its cleanliness.

I put the ring portion on (as with any solid cock ring) balls first, then shaft. Centered up the post and proceeded to slip the cage on and locked it into place.

The ring is very comfortable, and the cage is almost unnoticeable. I'm rather surprised that the whole unit isn't heavier. When we think of a metallic object that is roughly the same size and shape as a similar item manufactured from plastic, we assume that the metal version will be heavier. This isn't noticeably heavier, but it is markedly more comfortable.

Given that there is more access to the penis (all things considered), sensation is restored. The CB series units encompass so much of the flesh, and deny sensitivity at all, makes it seem as if there is a void where the penis is. This new cage doesn't prohibit sensations, so being able to touch and feel it, is actually a little alien considering what I haven't been able to feel over the last few months.

Well, with the aid of the Internet and a pair of headphones, I attempted an erection. No luck. So, I guess it works as advertised?

Pulling my penis out is rather easy (it was with the CB series as well), but the point isn't whether you can get out or not. There are devices that are certainly more secure, but definitely they will cost much more.

New cage coming...

Apparently, my skin is rather sensitive. Especially in the area effected by the cage. The CB-6000s doesn't really breathe all that well either. How some guys can say that is a permanent cage for them makes me wonder how.

After about two days in, I start to get a little sensitive at the base of the shaft where it meets the scrotum. Day three brings a itch that I obviously can't reach because of the limited access to that particular area. By day four, the itch turns into a burn that just won't subside. Day five is unbearable. I have to take it off, and I find the skin on the entire length of the shaft to be raw, broken, and bleeding from time to time. This is supposed to be fun and tormentingly torturous, not Crusades Era convert or die torture.

Coconut oil was recommended to me, and it does help immensely with the healing, but doesn't really provide much for long-term use while caged.

Hand lotion worked well for a while, but still only provided for three or four days until I could take no more.

Wet silicone lube was the best for longevity, but even at that, only gave me a few extra days.

We finally decided to take a chance on a steel cage. We understand that it is a Chinese knock off, and don't really expect much out of it quality wise. It is more of an experiment to see if there will be a similar issue.

If this experiment fails, then we have spent $30 and have learned that we have to take small breaks to allow the skin time to recover.

If it is a success, we will likely spend the money and get a high quality unit (I have been looking at the Mature Metal Jailbird). This also means that I could possibly be in the thing forever.

There is a part of me that kind of hopes it doesn't work. I mean, I do like my freedom from time to time. Recently, however, the only real freedom I get is when I am healing. Once the wounds are gone, I promptly throw the cage back on, like a good little boy.

I have had periodic releases in the last couple of months, but I really do miss jerking off. I could use a long, slow session right about now. Don't get me wrong. I love sex with my wife. But there's just times that doing the work yourself is quite fulfilling.

Just venting a little here...

If you don't want to read some, what may be exceptionally irrational, venting, please skip this post and move on to the next one.

As anyone who really knows me can attest, I am quite prone to incomprehensible rants that seem to have no real point. This will likely be one of those. More likely than not, this will sound like a lot of bitching and moaning. As screwed up as it sounds, I only say and type things as they come to mind. At least this way I can put all the shit in the right order.

I am so fucking frustrated right now, I can hardly see straight. I want to pull her close and hold her, and at the same time I want to grab her by the hair and tell her her all the crap that is on my mind.

I know we have our difficulties and differing views on many things. Our nonexistent sex life being one of them. I know sex isn't everything, but it is a big thing. Whether she thinks so or not.

To her, sex (at least with me) is a chore. Along the lines of doing dishes, running errands or cleaning the house. Anything sexual or sensual is just another one of those things she has to do.

We have talked about this many times, and we both have to to the same conclusion : neither of us are fully satisfied with each other in sexual terms. She needs help to be turned on enough to initiate sex. Be it books or a titillating talk with her boyfriend (long story), but I'm supposed to be appreciative of how much he turns her on and sends her to me. He lives four fucking hours away. All three of us know that if he were closer, she would be running off to him. So fuck that.

I have certain kinks that have gone unrequited for many years simply because she isn't in to them. Bondage being the most prominent of those. I have dealt with and satiated that particular desire with less than spectacular self-bondage sessions (I find it hard to get completely satisfied when I have to be able to release myself at a moments notice, which means it really isn't as secure as I would like.) and Internet porn. Watching videos, imagining that I was the one who tied her up, or that I am in that position. Yes, I like being on both sides of the rope.

Now, to be fair, there are a few things that have emerged in our more intimate lives that hadn't existed before. Things that neither of us had ever contemplated before. The more we experience, the more I find myself wanting to be at her feet. Owned and possessed completely. There is no one else that I can see myself giving myself up so freely for... At least for now.

Whiiiich brings me back to the subject of this blog. Mind you, I am leaving out a lot of topics. These are the ones that tend to create the most tension when they do come up.

As we rapidly approach four months, I find myself feeling rather discouraged. She has no direction (we have discussed it, so it isn't an accusatory statement). She doesn't know what it is that she wants out of it.

To be honest I'm not sure if I know quite what it is that I am looking for, but for now, some goal to work toward might be a good start. Maybe a little teasing, or some sort of attention or recognition of my particular circumstance.

And then she does something like last night (been writing this for a little over a day now). She comes home from work,  shuts the door, and has me pleasure her. (Exactly the kind of treatment that I have been craving). Mind you, this kind of thing has happened before, but it is so rare and random it's frustrating (in a bad way) and not sexually/mentally frustrating (humbling/humiliatingly) that gears me up so much.

My mind is generally disorganized chaos. To be able to focus one task, even for a few minutes gives me the chance to settle the storms in my head. If I can focus that attention on her, it not only clears my mind, but makes me happy (when she gets off) and her relaxed (when she gets off).

I am finding that I am not so concerned with my own release as much as I once was. As long as she gets hers, I'm happy. Mine used to come just whenever the urge struck me. Most likely because I figured someone should get off....might as well be me.

Added note: This was actually written a couple of weeks ago. I had forgotten that it hadn't been published until just now.

Monday, September 29 2014

Has been a little while since I have made an update so I thought it might be time.

My 6000s broke last week. I have been able to repair it, but have been out of it for a few days until I could get it fixed. Not to mention that it pinched the hell out of me when it came off.

A dab of superglue and all is better now. Going to hold off putting it back on until the poison ivy has run its course. Got it on my hands, arms and feet last Sunday, and I sure as heck don't want it spreading to that area and not be able to take care of it.

UPDATE : Monday, October 13th

Broke a second ring. At this point I have realized that a more radical answer was needed. I found all the pieces from the broken ring and repaired that. Once that was setup and cured, I assembled the rest of the ring portion and with liberal doses of superglue, I basically welded the parts together. Now it is a solid ring with the cage, spacer, and locking pin separate pieces. Seems to be working just fine.

Also a note that does deserve recognition (you know who you are), I am no longer using the Wet lubricant. I was beginning to experience flaking skin all over the area. It was suggested that I try coconut oil. Within just a few days, the flaking skin had gone away, and the remnant scabs left over from the healing from just being rubbed raw wiped away. A week later, and very little attention to the equipment is needed throughout the day.
I do, however, still remove the device every day for hygiene and cleaning. Once all is dried, I oil up and back into my prison. (I think I have an understanding as to what inmates in solitary feel like... Three hots and a couple.)

Still holding out for some attention or teasing. We did have sex a few nights ago. For me it went far too quickly. I would have loved for it to have lasted longer. There were things working against us that morning. Our kids and/or their friends could have walked in at any moment. BUT we got it done. When I was done, she made me go down and clean her up. I can't describe how turned on I was when she made that simple demand.